2024-07-06T19:18:10Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz 🎃 Stark +053 (Fearful) 🏴‍☠️ https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/npub1e3q7qqf4jreeqw8g04edqjpcnvpzws0enxhp0xgvxfru4xj0wz9smm9ujj https://nostrcheck.me/media/stark053/avatar.webp?25 https://nostrcheck.me/media/stark053/avatar.webp?25 https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqs928yz3dc547cr960qq89nk7a0966k76794slukdnajks0p3eh74szyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgk0rhc82 I assume nostr is working well enough these days to let the old npub repost this without any issue<br/><blockquote class="border-l-05rem border-l-strongpink border-solid"><div class="-ml-4 bg-gradient-to-r from-gray-100 dark:from-zinc-800 to-transparent mr-0 mt-0 mb-4 pl-4 pr-2 py-2">quoting <br/><span itemprop="mentions" itemscope itemtype="https://schema.org/Article"><a itemprop="url" href="/nevent1qqsqqqqy6n0lazdal3zymn6q5p9z4grj65003vhhzl9hufpr7zhk7xspzpmhxue69uhhxmmvda3k7tnwdshsygrhwmpj6jcar69l92tt40458tv6mc2hh5mrmzdc07mrumc524vg3qpsgqqqqqqs8e2y6a" class="bg-lavender dark:prose:text-neutral-50 dark:text-neutral-50 dark:bg-garnet px-1">nevent1q…2y6a</a></span> </div> My memory on my early experience with nostr is a bit foggy so I should write down what I remember now and save it in text.<br/><br/>I don't have record of the first npubs I made. The first npub I still have record of was used for testing private messages and it didn't really work so I abandoned it. This was early last year. The other npubs I made around that time were also for testing stuff and I didn't really find nostr functional enough to gain momentum so I didn't try to help it gain momentum as an early user beyond bits of testing.<br/><br/>The earliest npub I actually used regularly was in October last year, when Digit had disappeared a couple months prior and more recently Gaza had come under assault. That npub was <span itemprop="mentions" itemscope itemtype="https://schema.org/Person"><a itemprop="url" href="/npub1e3q7qqf4jreeqw8g04edqjpcnvpzws0enxhp0xgvxfru4xj0wz9smm9ujj" class="bg-lavender dark:prose:text-neutral-50 dark:text-neutral-50 dark:bg-garnet px-1"><span>🎃 Stark +053 (Fearful) 🏴‍☠️</span> (<span class="italic">npub1e3q…9ujj</span>)</a></span> which I treated as temporary because I assumed I would need to cycle npubs later (because I didn't know anything about nos2x etc while setting that one up).<br/><br/>It felt really frustrating that nostr was working better now that digit had already disappeared.<br/><br/>That npub I mentioned from October last year ended up getting shadowbanned. As I remember, I was saying violent hateful things about Israelis which would get a person banned on Twitter, to see if nostr would allow such statements. If I remember correctly, there was a particular Israel supporter who had connections who I really upset and it snowballed from there. I think my notifications were the first thing that stopped working, then I stopped being able to send direct messages to people I had been chatting with and it became inconsistent for my public posts to show up, especially in arguments and places where I was talking about the shadowban. This then stopped being npub-specific and started seeming to apply to all my npubs at the time. My mom helped me test it and there's still a post from her on bluesky talking about it from back then. No attempts to discuss the topic lead anywhere, there's zero engagement on that bluesky post for example.<br/><br/>There are a lot of gaps in my memory, like: what public posts couldn't I get to go through? Was it actually that posts wouldn't go through (as it definitely was with direct messages after extensive testing) or was it just that post visibility wasn't consistent, and that combined with lack of notifications made it impossible to have fair debates? My paranoia and bitterness and being distracted worrying about digit all make the answers to these questions foggy in my memory, and if I didn't write this down, soon I'd have fog clouding the parts about direct messages and notifications too. </blockquote> 2024-07-18T15:14:23Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsv4rdwgu9f62e64v0sp5mvl2ddp8987atztm62jjsxm6rtk7umg8gzyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgku3yfdm Might repost posts from the newer key for a little while to help my old followers from here find me there -<blockquote class="border-l-05rem border-l-strongpink border-solid"><div class="-ml-4 bg-gradient-to-r from-gray-100 dark:from-zinc-800 to-transparent mr-0 mt-0 mb-4 pl-4 pr-2 py-2">quoting <br/><span itemprop="mentions" itemscope itemtype="https://schema.org/Article"><a itemprop="url" href="/nevent1qqszwv5g0uv8808v5wezsnl4l2he95z8404c7stzknwgnnc4chnm5xqpzpmhxue69uhhxmmvda3k7tnwdshsygrhwmpj6jcar69l92tt40458tv6mc2hh5mrmzdc07mrumc524vg3qpsgqqqqqqsnt83vt" class="bg-lavender dark:prose:text-neutral-50 dark:text-neutral-50 dark:bg-garnet px-1">nevent1q…83vt</a></span> </div> Recap of what's going on in my life to help make my recent posts less confusing -<br/><br/>Short version:<br/><br/>* I love a woman called digit who I only knew on the internet, it seems she's either killed herself or faked her death for the wallstreetbets chat room we met in<br/>* I've been gangstalked for years by people who started out on reddit and they constantly attack me for "cyberstalking" her and not caring about age of consent bullshit <br/>* These attacks are incredibly popular, beloved by the people, so my friends have all abandoned me and nobody cares or helps me find out if Digit is safe (to be clear, I'm 27 and she's mid 30s)<br/>* I might be chemically lobotomized just for trying to find out if she is safe<br/>* It might help if I can find people who don't see trying to find out if a loved one faked their death or not as evil "cyberstalking," who don't think age-of-consent opposers deserve to die, who care enough to do anything anyone has the power to do to help me find out if she's safe<br/><br/><br/>-------<br/><br/>Longer version:<br/><br/>* I've been gangstalked for years by people who started out on reddit - search online for "DarqWolff" (former reddit username) or "DarqWolff rdrama.net" (username + site my fans hang out on)<br/>* All my closest bonds have been based on worrying about the safety of women I met online, starting with my first girlfriend being a suicidal girl in a support group when I was a teenager, creating a snowball effect where I'm too scared to be distracted by anything except more fear and new women can't override my fake (according to Digit - wondering if I can prove her wrong) sense of loyalty to scare me more than past women without much worse horror stories<br/>* This lead me to discover the worst horror story in the English language, the story of a woman in a wallstreetbets chat room calling herself Digit who couldn't get her PhD because she couldn't get past someone she loved dying while she was working on it, so she hated herself ever since and wasted her time with abusive people online, all while being the most amazing woman, capable of saving the world but instead suffering alone like this - and she gave me a chance and reached out to me when I was suicidal and she saved my life, and then she survived cancer but became suicidal herself, and her abusive friends lied to her about me and coordinated with my gangstalkers from reddit to character assassinate me and it compounded with me being worthless and she couldn't trust me or anyone anymore<br/>* She deleted her reddit and discord accounts and disappeared about a year ago<br/>* Everything I've done in life since getting to know her has been focused on her, nothing tops the significance of what happened with her. Everything I do is trying to impress her if she is safe, trying to find out if she is, preparing to avenge her and our sabotaged friendship if she isn't<br/>* I usually talk about her all the time, but when I made this npub I tried to be anonymous and separate my work going after the military industrial complex (to save her world) from my work trying to find out if she's actually here (in the world I'm doing it for)<br/>* I can't shut up about her anymore - 2 nights ago someone sent me screenshots of someone on discord claiming to be her brother saying she killed herself. There is no proof<br/>* A mutual internet contact who knows her real life contact information once wrote her a letter for me, and he says she faked her death for the chat room people, but he offers no proof either<br/>* After years of me worrying about Internet women, and the past 2 years of me begging everyone for help getting past wallstreetbets censorship to let her know her friends there have deceived her about me, my friends have pretty much all abandoned me and the ones left are unable to help me anyway and I'm not sure if even they can fully be trusted <br/>* I'm trying everything I can think of - I'll try to make her story go viral so the wallstreetbets chat is flooded with people asking about her, I made an article about her on the wiki in case maybe she sees it somehow, I keep asking anyone who might have information<br/>* I don't have many leads for finding out if she's safe - I have a possible address for a guy she dated online, he's in a state I have an arrest warrant in and one of my only ideas is to go fight him and get arrested and then proceed from there continuing trying to find ways to cause problems for people who hurt her and hope it leads to me finding out if she's safe eventually <br/>* All of this fear and abuse has left mercy in my heart for only a tiny handful of exceptions in the human race, making it harder to get any help </blockquote> 2024-07-06T21:23:52Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqs8k0epy0e54p5sn6hvs56nf0mgdy7t2ty9d8ge6vqgphfmugt2tzczyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkzcn209 Been on a new key for a while <br/><br/><span itemprop="mentions" itemscope itemtype="https://schema.org/Person"><a itemprop="url" href="/nprofile1qqs8wakr9493685t725kh2ltgwke4hs400fk8kymslak8eh3g42c3zqprpmhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuumwdae8gtnnda3kjctvqy28wumn8ghj7un9d3shjtnyv9kh2uewd9hszrthwden5te0dehhxtnvdakq7xuqx0" class="bg-lavender dark:prose:text-neutral-50 dark:text-neutral-50 dark:bg-garnet px-1"><span>🇵🇸 whoever loves Digit</span> (<span class="italic">nprofile…uqx0</span>)</a></span><br/><br/>/<br/><br/>7776c32d4b1d1e8bf2a96babeb43ad9ade157bd363d89b87fb63e6f145558888 2024-07-06T19:09:05Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqs0u80wka6layyeaa7dne0v7tg48tdjhrrwxzcqmadrdg3mh4kvmggzyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkpnklsk In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqspx2h3y0r246jkfx0k0hxxraf6zts64la4sc9kvjkjqyzks9vecfcekr07r'>nevent1q…r07r</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Should, but I worry 2023-10-26T16:42:18Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsfxjv4gydu6tgqnpjt5lsqce6x7upmu0kdxz4e6wlq5e66zfm7mlszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkrtq5s8 Nostr being fragmented is not the same thing as being decentralized 2023-10-26T16:40:02Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsykpt75u9tug2ya73fkg8ujc5c5thmyh38dnelselrg2d47py88fszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkseaphw In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsgjn8q2ty3udgsw82nfhj2mjxyqqpxurstqemhpwmdnfhlgrlg87gxf950r'>nevent1q…950r</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Actually I probably will forget it, which is why I posted this to make it memorable in the future 2023-10-26T16:36:44Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsgjn8q2ty3udgsw82nfhj2mjxyqqpxurstqemhpwmdnfhlgrlg87gzyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgk77qsdw I&#39;ll never forget that <span itemprop="mentions" itemscope itemtype="https://schema.org/Person"><a itemprop="url" href="/npub1nm02fpuwfhz5kewysscjmdsgym6ald038pxxfawqwvhzcf06t9sqsl6pru" class="bg-lavender dark:prose:text-neutral-50 dark:text-neutral-50 dark:bg-garnet px-1"><span>le-figaro</span> (<span class="italic">npub1nm0…6pru</span>)</a></span> on nostr was the source I finally learned about the Lewiston shooting from, more hours after it happened than how many hours by car I live from Lewiston 2023-10-26T16:36:18Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqszfqsxtlxlm0dfv3a3emjf0tlspcuahanwhru5suck35ynzd2gffszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgk2666mk In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsg6y4wul555kw2j72c0xswxplkzxtdvg2smyjezqyym8678hyft0ccua497'>nevent1q…a497</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>You&#39;re right, it is weird that this information was given so vaguely with no specific details 2023-10-26T16:30:19Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsggsrxkktxheyug6wgfltxq5cgwwx9mg3prnl4tehh53qzlu4t6dszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgky9qg07 In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsqqv7gjqm7a2jk7wvw9p2mnm64r2fctv7enxjn9cw9pqjm4e56esqc34rh0'>nevent1q…4rh0</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>I guess maybe one of those countries on the left will be a good one to side with in world war 3 🤔 2023-10-25T21:52:17Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqs9uwtep9f0lvqaej2ypqjk2sfzhqejgpapf6hjsvswf05ng4md7rszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgky5nc4h In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsyfu52qg740q7dwtq0lj88savgd86g0ulrj8sh5k7476xztssz8tgfhv5cu'>nevent1q…v5cu</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Brilliant 💪 2023-10-25T18:51:12Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsf5yt8txu7z2m3q3sjz7rj5lkdafrkjv0a5g9dz7mc6mn9fvrne8qzyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgktjt7qg In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsq5rqhspzrflq2gv6ujwe74alfaxxpy55hvcveyfrghvzflm7l2pqlk5gfh'>nevent1q…5gfh</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>The UN is complicit anyway, this struggle of power is a fake performance 2023-10-25T18:37:03Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsfqdamr2uqks5rah794q37f3d72mnt5dm4g8nswv0dyssd4dm97tczyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkhwtnj5 In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsfxqhtra3emw0qh99ynqcmqr6ntt6v9rpz7sc4kpw60wwkptxqessj549c7'>nevent1q…49c7</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Gm roya 🫶 2023-10-25T15:47:48Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsz04sdc5j9hde5hf0fwvmknnqw5kl0l64rsvpzgv5gdvvls6xlafszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkusyz24 In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqstz4qmncv5avl8wda3rhd5jnv7dajs4rdjzjkeck72gquuaalltqs93g7js'>nevent1q…g7js</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Gm Onyx 🖤 2023-10-25T14:21:26Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqs0r9gsnr8ftp8l0kqz9xaa3vh42rp6d86lrxu8e4mzqwkwqsswkcszyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgke6wrfp In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsvkdtdsqmrzmsk0tukmlc37dcdm4dwnkv7svzlx5y6h4hwqjxhless9j7qd'>nevent1q…j7qd</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Nice going, Turkey 2023-10-25T13:38:11Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsgzresffsfvc8pr9et8av37t535ytt2mkgczjwduqgetnp02s7qcqzyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkxpmwsc In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsv4r6838jma6f3frv2fnl4rfxaqlh3lau44wwemr6e6klqgu7qvvck05rmn'>nevent1q…5rmn</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>There were wars before currency but I guess you could argue there was money back then too 🤔 2023-10-25T13:36:15Z https://njump.cloud.vinney.xyz/nevent1qqsrsmt4xqz30s9cyyx7clh9nsyyz6ykmmhhrk0vnrur7snvqzpfedqzyrxyrcqpxkg08ypcap7h95zg8zdsyf6plxv6u9uepsey0j56facgkmeyapw In reply to <a href='/nevent1qqsgcmthjdqqjjxfdt68u5qkqpzklcrz6c0dg4u4l7fvaeys9x50gwg480pf0'>nevent1q…0pf0</a><br/>_________________________<br/><br/>Nah, fuck Israel 2023-10-25T12:14:57Z